Throw Back Thursday

Throw Back Thursday

When I was in high school, I hung out with a group of guys, all a bit older than me, who liked to make movies and asked me to be in them.

Get your mind out of the gutter.

Albert, Bill, Lee, David and the guys were not porn producers…they were funny writers and would-be producers/actors who walked right up to the edge of nerd-ville without ever quite crossing the city limits. They were older and from a different school, so being with them was a humorous respite from the real-life drama I found at South Miami High.

We did little short films here and there, but one year I was cast in what was to be an epic comedy, a spoof of the always-popular James Bond films. They had a friend named Fritz who had white-blonde hair who was cast as James Blonde. His nemesis, Russian spy Boris Natchkin, was played by David Greenfield. I was cast as Boris’ hardline Soviet assistant and border-line love interest, Fraulein Leibchen. I’m not sure anyone ever questioned her curiously German name, or the fact that she (meaning I) was always assigned the hardest lines.

Sadly, the film was never finished. But my friend Albert has some footage that he recently clipped together for me.

Neither of us can remember the plot. It started with a prisoner/spy exchange. There was a plan to save America from the rich capitalist corrupt legislators. And there was a running gag about cats. To relax, Boris liked to throw cats into the ocean, so he instructed Fraulein Leibchen to order some crates of cats for him. (Not Soviet cats. They had to be California cats, any color would do.) Smitten by love, the Fraulein obeyed, which must have been a stretch for my acting abilities, as I was a crazy cat lady even then.

There is no real point to this post, other than to say, here I am playing a German-named Soviet spy who betrayed her own cat code to further her lover’s communist agenda. It would never happen in real life.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mary has spoken to hundreds of groups in the Carolinas and across the country, including Meeting Professionals International, Public Relations Society of America, Lowe’s Home Improvement, the North Carolina Conference for Women, among others.

2 Comments

  1. Lee K 5 years ago

    Hi Mary! The film excerpts are from the FREEWHIP Production’s “Blondefinger”, which was the follow-up to the critically acclaimed debut of James Blonde entitled “James Blonde”. It was groundbreaking for several reasons: 1. We actually had a Super 8 camera that could record with sound. 2. The script, written by Bill Whittle, was nothing short of brilliant and was a marked departure of the, um, on-the-fly plot development of the first film. 3. There were better and more diverse shooting locations such as the Biltmore Hotel, South Beach, and of course endless scenes done at Miami International Airport, most of which feature the character walking and talking, preceding Aaron Sorkin by decades. The final climatic scene was to be done filming from a helicopter.

    Fraulein Leibchen was East German, so she was a perfect Cold War companion of the evil Boris Natchkin. While undoubtedly beautiful, she was a little dogmatic in Communist doctrines.

    Alas, the plans for “Blondefinger” exceeded the resources available. Filming went from June to August and the actors had to get back to school with only half the scenes completed. It remains an unfinished work with tremendous potential and has developed legendary status in the film industry as an equal of “Citizen Kane” or “Birth of a Nation” and was reportedly a shoe-in for the 1978 Academy Award for Best Picture. If we we able to finish it, that is…

    • Author
      Mary 5 years ago

      Lee,

      Thanks so much for the clarification! Nice to hear from you here!

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